Who's next?

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lpm
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Re: Who's next?

Post by lpm » Tue Sep 06, 2022 7:12 am

There will be a big bump in the CON numbers for a few weeks.

Voters like winners. They like the ritual of her getting queened, arriving at number 10, becoming a stateswoman. There will be the tabloid sentimentality and the photos and the childhood stories.

The fictional techniques for creating a hero are powerful enough to overcome any reality.

Plus a £100 billion bribe is always nice.
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TimW
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Re: Who's next?

Post by TimW » Tue Sep 06, 2022 7:24 am

TimW wrote:
Mon Sep 05, 2022 9:13 pm
It's been claimed that Boris is admired from Kiev to Carlisle.

Not Scotland though, fair enough.
Ooh, maybe that's why the Queen has broken tradition and summoned Boris to Scotland, he's for it. Cunning.

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TimW
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Re: Who's next?

Post by TimW » Tue Sep 06, 2022 7:33 am

And apparently I missed his farewell lies.

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Re: Who's next?

Post by Little waster » Tue Sep 06, 2022 8:16 am

TimW wrote:
Mon Sep 05, 2022 9:13 pm
It's been claimed that Boris is admired from Kiev to Carlisle.
That was a typo, it was meant to read "Boris is admired in Kiev and Carlisle."

Just them, no-where else.
This place is not a place of honor, no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here, nothing valued is here.
What is here was dangerous and repulsive to us.
This place is best shunned and left uninhabited.

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Little waster
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Re: Who's next?

Post by Little waster » Tue Sep 06, 2022 8:21 am

If there is any justice in the world history will remember him thus.

I'd probably keep the volume down if you are at work or near a Tory.
This place is not a place of honor, no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here, nothing valued is here.
What is here was dangerous and repulsive to us.
This place is best shunned and left uninhabited.

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Re: Who's next?

Post by Allo V Psycho » Tue Sep 06, 2022 9:07 am

Little waster wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 8:21 am
If there is any justice in the world history will remember him thus.

I'd probably keep the volume down if you are at work or near a Tory.
Excellent! Should I post it on Facebook?

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lpm
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Re: Who's next?

Post by lpm » Tue Sep 06, 2022 10:16 am

Interesting change to the usual PM resignation rituals. And will be televised live!
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lpm
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Re: Who's next?

Post by lpm » Tue Sep 06, 2022 10:19 am

Boris is driven to a remote Highlands mountainside, where he'll be thrown out the back of an army truck.

TV footage will come from drones that will track him as he stumbles along a 30 mile route to a finish point marked by a Ukrainian flag.
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lpm
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Re: Who's next?

Post by lpm » Tue Sep 06, 2022 10:22 am

The SAS will be hunting him. They are unarmed, but of course if they catch him it'll be fairly straightforward to kill him with their bare hands.

A unit of Ukrainian new recruits are able to defend him. If they can find him, that is, and if they can dodge the SAS.

It's fairly well balanced. William Hill gives him surviving at 7-4 on. I've bet against, because he'll get lost and fall in a bog.
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lpm
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Re: Who's next?

Post by lpm » Tue Sep 06, 2022 10:23 am

Sky have won the broadcast rights. But there's objections, because it should be deemed a national sporting event on free-to-air, like the world cup and Wimbledon.
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lpm
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Re: Who's next?

Post by lpm » Tue Sep 06, 2022 10:26 am

A nice statement from Zelensky, expressing confidence in Boris and telling him to stay strong. Those Ukrainian recruits will be highly motivated to defend him. But some of the SAS might be highly motivated to kill him, if their grandma was killed by his pandemic failures?
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Re: Who's next?

Post by FlammableFlower » Tue Sep 06, 2022 10:59 am

Who are you pitching this to?

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Tessa K
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Re: Who's next?

Post by Tessa K » Tue Sep 06, 2022 11:04 am

How long before the current wife divorces him?

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TimW
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Re: Who's next?

Post by TimW » Tue Sep 06, 2022 11:07 am

Is somebody else pregnant?

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shpalman
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Re: Who's next?

Post by shpalman » Tue Sep 06, 2022 11:07 am

What are they going to make Liz Truss do, invade the Falklands?
having that swing is a necessary but not sufficient condition for it meaning a thing

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Re: Who's next?

Post by Tessa K » Tue Sep 06, 2022 11:14 am

At least Dorries has resigned. She'll probably be rewarded with a peerage but at least we won't have to listen to her sucking up to Boris anymore.

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lpm
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Re: Who's next?

Post by lpm » Tue Sep 06, 2022 11:33 am

Oh, well played your majesty, great parting gift.

The queen has given Boris an engraved silver match case. It's a trap. He will think the value is the matches - when of course lighting a fire would be noticed by the SAS and be fatal. The real value is the case - he can use it to flash signals to the Ukrainians.
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lpm
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Re: Who's next?

Post by lpm » Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:01 pm

Liz has appointed Liz.

Last time the monarch and the PM had the same name was during reign of William IV. Quiz question: who was that PM?
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Tessa K
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Re: Who's next?

Post by Tessa K » Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:03 pm

lpm wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:01 pm
Liz has appointed Liz.

Last time the monarch and the PM had the same name was during reign of William IV. Quiz question: who was that PM?
William Lamb. Twice.

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Re: Who's next?

Post by dyqik » Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:32 pm

lpm wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:01 pm
Liz has appointed Liz.
Liz and Liz Prime.

Alternatively:

"This is a question for Liz"
"Which Liz?"
"ER"

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Re: Who's next?

Post by Woodchopper » Tue Sep 06, 2022 1:59 pm

lpm wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:01 pm
Liz has appointed Liz.

Last time the monarch and the PM had the same name was during reign of William IV. Quiz question: who was that PM?
Similar in Denmark.

The current monarch is Queen Margrethe II

The current Prime Minister is Mette Frederiksen, where Mette is to Margrethe as Liz is to Elizabeth.

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lpm
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Re: Who's next?

Post by lpm » Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:01 pm

Tessa K wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:03 pm
lpm wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:01 pm
Liz has appointed Liz.

Last time the monarch and the PM had the same name was during reign of William IV. Quiz question: who was that PM?
William Lamb. Twice.
Correct.

For 5 points, he has no famous quotation, but his wife has a well-known saying about someone she was shagging. What and who?
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Re: Who's next?

Post by tenchboy » Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:13 pm

lpm wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:01 pm
Tessa K wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:03 pm
lpm wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:01 pm
Liz has appointed Liz.

Last time the monarch and the PM had the same name was during reign of William IV. Quiz question: who was that PM?
William Lamb. Twice.
Correct.

For 5 points, he has no famous quotation, but his wife has a well-known saying about someone she was shagging. What and who?
Lady Caroline of Lord Byron, "Mad Bad & Dangerous to Know"

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Tessa K
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Re: Who's next?

Post by Tessa K » Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:25 pm

tenchboy wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:13 pm
lpm wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:01 pm
Tessa K wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 12:03 pm


William Lamb. Twice.
Correct.

For 5 points, he has no famous quotation, but his wife has a well-known saying about someone she was shagging. What and who?
Lady Caroline of Lord Byron, "Mad Bad & Dangerous to Know"
I actually knew that without looking it up.

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Re: Who's next?

Post by tenchboy » Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:32 pm

Tessa K wrote:
Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:25 pm

I actually knew that without looking it up.
I actually did too so neh!
Getting on for forty years ago, a mate of ours got on one of those afternoon tv quizzes*. He was asked that question and didn't know the answer*. We didn't take the piss much at all*. Kinda fixes it in yer mind for good that does*.

*One of these statements is untrue.

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